What is Love?

"Love is patient, love is kind, love does not keep a record of wrongs..."

Many couples have this text read at their weddings, at least in the West. It comes from the Bible, 1 Corinthians 13. The full definition of love, comprised in a few short lines (see below) encompasses the single most sought-after desire in the universe. We all need love. Insanity, even death grows when there is a lack of love in someone's life.

But what is love, in practical terms? How do I know if I'm loving 'enough' or worthy of the love I'm offered?

For me the benchmark for love is 'how far am I willing to go for someone else?' The more I'm willing to give/sacrifice/risk the greater my love. For example, I know I love my child and my husband a lot. I know this, not because I feel excited when I see them or enjoy their company, though I do. But I know I love them because I've put their interests, needs before my own on many occasions. I love myself too, as demonstrated by the (healthy) practice of sometimes putting my own needs first. And based on this marker of assessment, I love others too, but I confess it is on a sliding scale. Some people are just not as important to me as my husband or my son and so I give less to them.

But I am a Believer and Follower of Jesus and as such, I must also consider, how much do I love him? It's one of those questions Followers ask of themselves because it is a part of their faith to do so.
If my faith is sincere, will I give up everything for Jesus? Do I love him more than my hubby, my child, myself? From many pulpits we are encouraged to walk that walk if, indeed we profess 'Christianity'. But do I?

I have begun to read a book called "The Imitation of Christ" written in the fifteenth century. I only read the chapter headings and the introduction to discover, I don't love Jesus nearly as much as I thought I did before opening the cover of the book. The book has sparked in me the realization that what I profess and what I practice are not identical. While I know I'm loved by God anyway, it doesn't make me feel good to be less than I thought.

But as this blog is about being 'up with life' and 'living purposefully' I must get to the positive perspective of this post: Who I am may not be all I thought I was, but who I am is alright with God and Jesus' love shows me that. And although I may not be as sincere in my love as I thought I was, being honest with myself and continuing to aim to give up for others shows me I'm on the right track.

Being a hypocrite is easy; being perfect is hard. But being sincere in the effort to love and to receive love is the path that most of us are on and which is the path that leads to peace of mind, hope and good relationships.

My Family

So, what is love? Love is being patient, kind, honouring toward others and myself. If I can forgive myself my inconsistencies, I'm better able to forgive others theirs, and closer to being the loving person I want to be.

(1 Corinthians 13: Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful; it is not arrogant or rude. Love does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends")